After having a discussion with some friends over the weekend... I have been mulling over our discussion. It was a multi-faceted discussion so I will try to give you some highlights. I also really want some feedback here. What do you think? You "google reader" readers - take the time to come to my blog and leave a comment.
* Is it a Biblical mandate for a woman to be a stay at home Mom? (Some of this came out of a discussion about Mrs. Palin)
* What do you think about a stay at home Dad?
* Are men to be the "bread winners"?
* Are women wired to be more nurturing than men? What if personality reverses this in a marriage? i.e. the male is more nurturing....Then a SAHD?
This is kind of a separate thought... and yet connected at the same time. We discussed how God has created each person with skills for accomplishing His dream for their life. As a small child - you envision yourself - using your skills - and make decisions to accomplish this dream in your life. For example - Bill Clinton wanted to be president from the time he was a small boy. Every decision he made had that goal in mind.
* Is this how your life has been driven with one focused goal in sight? Or (more like my story would be...) did you follow the twists & turns without being able to see the end in sight?
* Another question is this.... based on the above premises.... Is it your "dream" to be a SAHM? Or should it be? Or does God set some dreams aside and say this is my dream for you now? Does He tweak your dream as you walk with Him through life?
Growing up my ultimate dream wasn't to be a SAHM. I loved kids. Worked with kids all my life mostly. Have two degrees in Education. So, here I am today. This is where the twists and turns of life have placed me. Was it what I envisioned as a child? No. Am I satisfied? Sure. Was this God's dream for my life? Right now. Yes.
8 comments:
Neat discussion. I have often wondered about being a SAHM, but I've never felt a huge pull to be one. Obviously my feelings may change after I have a baby. My mom always worked full time and because of this, we were able to enjoy a lot of things that other kids may not have had (i.e. playings sports, playing cowboys and indians in the summer with real horses, living in the country etc.) I think each person much make sure they are in the center of God's will for their life as they know it. I never dreamed I would be a pastor's wife, even while at GBS I didn't feel as if I was cut out for that and yet here I am. It was never a dream of mine, but yet I feel strangely happy and content right here where I am. I know when the time comes to decide to be a SAHM or a career woman, God will be there to direct me as well.
much=must
Hi, Tara Joyce - this is your "old maid" Aunt responding, briefly, to at least part of your blog. I'm sure you're familiar with these Scriptures..Titus 2:4&5 "..to love their children" (how better than being home to train them?) "to be..keepers at home...". I Tim. 5:8 "..if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house..." (man's duty?) and I Tim. 5:14 "..younger women marry, bear children, guide the house..". Sounds like God's ideal plan, though I know sometimes circumstances alter cases. My Mom worked because Daddy was disabled.
I'll we checking for more responses :-). Love you all lots...
I have done a lot of thinking on this very subject since Carson was born. I haven't really come to a firm conclusion, I do know that at some point I would love not to work and stay home....
Interesting thing, I just joined a bible study and it is on the life of Saul/Paul; and if I understand it correctly, the father was the responsible one for all of the teaching, and protecting from harmful things.
Hmmm, much to think about :)
Can't pass up a chance to comment, since this has been running through my mind since Palin could very well be the next VP. I've been rather surprised at the way Conservative Christians have been so excited over McCain's choice. It would seem to run cross-grain to the way most "holiness' people view the Biblical structure for the home. If she does end up being a VP, don't you think her job performance will be affected by her family? I mean, if she is the "great Mom' that a lot of Conservatives are portraying her, won't the office of VP suffer just a little? Or what if she DOES see America as her top priority....then won't her family suffer? And what about the SAH Dad? She runs the nation....but supposedly he will still run the home?? I for one am confused, and quite frankly not quite as excited about her as some of my friends seem to be. If you could ask her kids....would they want their Mommy at home with them every day, or do they want her to be gome long hours, what do you think they would honestly say? Having a Mom stay at home with you seems to be such a "luxury" these days, and I'm thoroughly convinced that should not be the case. It is the right of a child to cry and have his Mommy there to answer him/her.....not a luxury. I will be interested in reading any other comments you get. You raised a great topic for debate. Blessings on you as you stay at home! Emily is just as cute as she can be! They grow up so fast....I'm so happy I get the chance to stay at home and raise mine! I will be forever grateful for a husband who allows me to do this!
Just for the record, the McCain/Palin ticket still beats the other option....just so you know where I stand! I just wish it could be better...:)
When I heard about Palin, my thought was can I vote for her,(?) because the Bible says that a woman is not to have authority over a man. Now, I will vote simply because there isn't a better option.
I just gave up a good job, that was fulfilling and paid fairly well, because I feel like it is best for my family and daughter. I will never regret this decision or my decision to stay home with my kids when they were small. I taught them about God and the Bible, and no one else would teach them my values. I was also available to my husband. The world teaches that you aren't worth anything if you are "just" a stay at home Mom. Personally, I disagree although it is easy to buy in to their theory. Just take yourself to a funeral though, like I recently went to my young brother's funeral, and say to yourself, "What really matters in life?" It is so cut and dried when someone dies. The only things that really matter are relationships. (He touched a lot of lives.) All these extra "things" that we want amount to nothing with eternities values in view. When I get to heaven, God won't care if I had a fancier house, job, car anything, just that I touched other people's lives. God chooses the poor of this world to be rich in faith. Just think about that for a while. If I am poor, I will have more faith, simply because I will trust in God and not myself. If I am rich, I will likely have less faith, because I will trust in my own ability or my own financial situation. It isn't always easy, but God will and can provide.
Just somethings to think about along with me. :-)
Great minds blog alike, huh?
Well - I'm kindof excited about how God takes all of our ambitions and interests and loves and gifts....and weaves them together in unexpected ways. He has recently reminded me of that.
So sometimes it's not really putting our dreams on hold at all, but using the fuel from those dreams in different ways. If I take the time to really explain myself, I'll be the one needing fuel from lack of sleep. So I'll stop at that.
Love your blog. Wish we could go camping and hiking together someday!!
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